The simple truth...13

Life is so like a slate.. you write, you wipe; you draw, you wipe; you spit, you wipe...

I'm thinking...

i have been bugged by some questions, through most of my life; even today, whenever i'm sitting, i'm thinking about this stuff..

-why do we have exams?? the reason we have exams is to find out who is the brainy one; but the one with brains would know, that most of the information taught is useless to him.. and thus would always be selective in his remembering that information.. which means, he won't be performing that well, so why do we have exams..

-if there is an older dating younger thing; the older one (irrespective of male/female), is always the culprit, and younger always the victim..don't get it, why?

-i've always wondered, if i realized that i've only 24 hrs to live what i'd do.. i might want to go on a dream holiday; switzerland, or venice.. but then, am i not supposed to be spending my last hours with my family; but actually, i'd hate to waste even a second in the sob ceremony, which is impossible to prevent when with your family; so i might just run away with a stranger, have a nice time; come back in the last hour, say my final good byes.. and dhooshhhh!!!

-ppl bargain with sabziwallah, autowallah, dhoodwallah, akhbaarwallah; and these same ppl have no problem when they enter a branded show-room, in getting Rs. 1000 slate..

-life is so like a slate.. you write, you wipe; you draw you wipe; you spit you wipe.. in the end, what you have, is a dirty old slate, and a huge bill(for chalks)..

-if i try to find my bill, till now.. taking my daily food expenses to be 50/- average, i'm Rs. 3.8 lakh worth.. money on my education; something around 2.4 lakhs.. my maintenance cost; soap, shampoo, doctor, parlour, clothes, movies, trips etc. around 9-10 lakhs.. so right now, i have eaten up, around 17 lakhs; and for nothing.. i don't listen to the ppl who made all these payments all these years; and i might not even spend my last 24 hrs with them... some, unthankful creature i'm..

-if i start reading a lot of authors, it would improve my writing skills but i wouldn't be able to be unimpressed, and not copy any of their styles; so i will kind of loose the originality in the process...

-isn't everything we do, kind of working on this principle; that we are forcefully trying to loose the originality.. i think we all are actually just a mixture of all ppl we have met till date.. since there is such complex number and ratio problem of who we meet and who we become; we never realize that we aren't actually unique; just a mere variation in ratio.. like in alloys; the proportion changes everything..

Shri Raseela...

I have always been waiting to try bhaang... last year, used some crap stuff, with no effects at all; so this year overdosed.. there are many things i don't like about it:
it tastes like horse shit, not that i've tasted horse shit before; but i'm assuming it would be a fair comparison.. i had it with milk(full cream) and no sugar; so tasted even worse.. second; i don't understand why it is so slow... i mean i lost all hopes, and was sympathizing with myself saying, at least i had milk, if nothing else.. and then 2-3 hours later, the "feeling" jump starts..

If to be described fully, the "feeling" is a mixture of things.. there is clear rapid horizontal and vertical vibratory motion in all things in proximity.. you IQ becomes zero, u no longer understand how sentences break up into words... your feet after years of load lifting, suddenly give up; and you cannot stand straight, or look straight... in my case, my throat was parched dry and mind delusional.. i could have enjoyed this uneasiness, but i figured it was best to just sleep.. so kinda wasted a lot of special effects.. but i slept like a hog, for a very very long time.. and when i got up, things moved in a slow motion, seemed as if instead of blood, it was indolence running in my veins... i could actually feel small processes that take place and get neglected every day.. every muscle movement, small sounds, wind, everything....

and i also got to know, that bhaang is a herb.. "Cannabis sativa"; and its cheap, 2 bucks thats it... like the holi we played this time... pure mud, keechad and ghaas, and water(actually meant for the plants)... organic, wild and free.. nice holi, this was :))

The side look

She looked so indifferent
walked as if some other world
crashed today here
and she's lost
and she has lost

things worked around her
but didn't seem to exist
maybe a ghost
but she gave a side look
and thats all it took

the dead struggle
restarted and redied
the flame in her eyes
she didn't loose , didn't crack
today she got herself back.

Long Walks!!

I can safely announce that I love long walks... provided, the weather is cool; there's nice smooth breeze, and I've my Ipod on, or a really interesting company... and when I come to think of it, who wouldn't???... anyways, latter is better, coz I kind of have music as my savior through out the day, like in 764, or my way to JNU or between classes or climbing stairs etc...

Its funny I don't feel tired even after hours of such walks, and I can start panting in minutes if either the music or the company goes away... God!! this btp is making me so lame, what am I writing; I think my head is going dry.. Gone are the lush creative rain-forests!!!; all I have now, is dry drain.. I honestly, have nothing to write, but I am going to, coz I haven't in a really long time.. and now I'm done.

my btp.

For those who don't know, btp is B. Tech project, which engineering ppl have to sail before they finally pass out... like the last lap or something... bloody 8 credits worth... and mine is driving me nuts...

Its like, hardly 2 months of my college life is left, it really disappoints (plus distresses plus scares plus agonizes) me to be thinking about this project, and having the sun-bath on my way to JNU while i pursue it...

I know, its stupid to be doing it at JNU; well!! actually it made sense sometime back.. i thought it'll be exciting and something concrete to finish off the college.. but i think i missed out the fact that, it'll take every second of my few last days of my NSIT stay...

Can anyone tell me, why i everytime, take the axe out and fix it on the ground; and then throw my leg on it; and then hit it again with another axe :((((